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Podcast TherapyZ | Co-Dependency and Connection

Life is interesting. It weaves, flows, stutters, changes and is continually moving. For the last little while, I have been on a journey of self-discovery. It all began in January, when I was at my highest weight EVER. It was completely shocking and discouraging. I have struggled with my weight for several years, but this was a low point. I finally realized that it was just not going to go away or get better without me really focusing on it and CHANGING my lifestyle. It’s been an interesting year, as I have tried to find the right program for me to get healthy. Something that I have especially come to understand is that without cleansing my mind, my physical body will never be healthy. It’s been a STRUGGLE! I’ve fought with myself and I’m still too hard on myself, but I am learning WHO I REALLY AM and what POTENTIAL I have. I’m desperately trying to work through my feelings and my despairs and my past. It’s still a journey; its still a struggle and its everyday, but I’m BECOMING something – someone I just might be okay with!

 

This year, I’ve also reconnected with my oldest and bestest friend, Beverly. A beautiful person who I grew up with and who like all of us, struggles and is on a journey of her own. I can’t tell you how much this reconnection has meant to me. It’s a true blessing from my Heavenly Father, that she reached out to me and even though we are hundreds of miles apart, I have truly felt her love and support. She is what has made this journey possible for me. One of the things that Beverly has taught me (along with some amazing podcasts) is THAT IT IS OKAY TO FEEL. In fact, it is the most important thing. Feelings can be overwhelming and sometimes you either keep it all inside yourself or you train your mind not to feel because it hurts to much. Both are so unhealthy. I think I tend to keep it inside so much and don’t share my pain and worries with others because I feel like I don’t want to be a burden or that it just feels too personal. But it builds up so much and eventually you will explode. Bev also introduced me to Isagenix (which I would love to talk to you about on another post soon) and to some amazing podcasts that have changed my life.

 

And that is where the idea of this blog series, was born. I have been listening to about 5 podcasts a week and really working hard to change my mindset and healing those things about me that have prevented me from making healthy connections with those around me and honestly, really connecting with myself for the first time ever. I feel amazing about how it is going and I just want to reach out and connect with all of you. We all have struggles and we all need help. We all need connection and this is one of the ways I would like to connect with each of you.  Another thing that helps me is “creating.” So my plan is to every month, listen to a podcast (in some cases, over and over), create journal cards and/or art prints to help you and I journal the process/inspire ourselves, share a summary and my comments/insights about the particular podcast episode, and connect with you! My hope is that by journaling and applying the concepts learned through the podcasts and spending time using my talents to “create” something that will help others, that I will find the healthy connections, the validation, and the change that will truly HEAL me and prepare me for the life that I want to live. I have found that healing takes WORK! Lots of work, but I’m willing and ready to get started.  How about you? Do you want to connect with me and work at this together? That’s what this is all about! Please join me on the 1st Sundays of every month for some,


Today’s Podcast:
Connexions Classroom 
Episode 1: Co-Dependency and Creating Connection

In this inaugural episode, Jodi Hildebrandt discusses the concept of co-dependency, explains how it disconnects us, and takes live questions from listeners.

As this is the very first episode, almost ten minutes of this podcast is spent talking about Connexions Classroom and their vision and what they have available. You will find that this is something that happens in the beginning of each of their podcasts, but as we are listening to these podcasts sometimes years after the episode aired, their current offerings might be different. I encourage you to check out their website for all that they have to offer. Their vision and purpose is truly amazing and I love that everything they do and offer can help anyone and everyone with principles of connection in all of your relationships. There are definitely some workshops that I would like to purchase and delve into eventually.

The discussion begins with a great definition of Co-Dependency. Co-Dependency is an attempt to get my own self-centric emotional and physical needs met by others. Jodi talks about how when you are in a co-dependent relationship (of any kind) that you only focus on yourself; the things you want, the things you desire, the things that matter to you.  It was really interesting for me to understand that if we are being co-dependent we use a kind of psedu-connection with food, money, powerful positions, or anything that we feel that will quiet our emotions down so that we can feel better about ourselves. Jodi simplified the definition even further with, “I make you responsible for me”.  It makes sense to me that with this co-dependency attitude that if I make others responsible for me then I don’t have to be responsible for myself and that it could be really easy to blame my mistakes or anything else on someone else. I think its so easy to get stuck in this kind of attitude and not even realizing that you are doing it. 

I’m a pretty independent person and so I usually think of myself as NOT co-dependent, but I can see that at times I do get trapped in a situation where maybe others don’t meet my expectations and so I will feel unloved or betrayed or just have some kind of uncomfortable emotion that I don’t want to feel so I blame another person or reach out to a pseudo-connection with food or something like that to feel better. I think that most of the time, I really do not realize that I am having such high expectations that I feel have to be met by others. This really made me think.  Jodi said that we need to start being aware of how and why it is we are connecting with our relationships (ANY relationship) or we won’t be able to identify whose being responsible for who in your life. That is something that I am really working on in my life – being aware of my emotions: what I am feeling and why I am feeling it; because most of the time, I don’t know. I am working at when I feel something, I just take a breath and then acknowledge that I am feeling something. I need to get to the “why I am feeling it” part but for now, I’m trying to just be aware and discover what I am feeling. It’s hard for me and I really appreciate that learning to be aware and holding myself accountable for my own choices is very important.

I loved the little part that Jodi talked about service. Service has always been something that I truly believe in and something that I want to bring into my life fully. Jodi states that “Service is a free gift that we offer another person with no strings attached”  and that it does not have to do with co-dependency at all. I appreciated her example of how her son had asked her to make breakfast for him and because they didn’t have a co-dependent relationship, she was able to just make him breakfast as a service and everything was great. She talked about if she hadn’t been able to make breakfast for him that morning that he would have been disappointed, but not personally affected, but if a co-dependency was an issue in this circumstance, then her son would have felt like it was a personal attack against him. Another great thing about this podcast is that she has some simple but wonderful examples of everyday situations that we can use to learn and apply these principles.

It was interesting to hear how most of us are very fluent in co-dependency because we were raised and taught that way and if you are a parent, co-dependency is quite literally what happens as we are responsible for our children. But I also appreciated that Jodi talked about how we can gradually teach our children to be independent (or interdependent) so that they can become healthy adults. A concept that really resonated with me is that as we discover the principles that will help us grow and have healthy relationships, we need to also teach our children these concepts to enable them and empower them (but we have to learn to do it for ourselves first). I liked that she said we do have a responsibility to actively instruct our children to stay connected with themselves. I just like that idea of “staying connected with myself” – I need to learn to do that.

When we are in a co-dependent relationship we are in a drama-cycle. Jodi said that there are 3 positions in a drama cycle: Victim, Persecutor, Rescuer and the position that we are in is how we act out our co-dependency. The drama is how we act out our insecurity.

 

The final minutes of this podcast was answering some questions:

Could you walk us through this drama cycle with forgiving another person who has harmed you? (this was asked specifically in regards to someone with addiction, but I think it can apply to anyone)

Jodi replied that in order to offer forgiveness to others you must first let go/surrender and forgive YOURSELF. Resentments are coming from Anger and they are staying because you can’t let go of your anger. Anger is coming because expectations you had that didn’t come to fruition. We need to look at ourselves first and come to understand what our expectations were. There are reasonable expectations and ones that were spoken and then there are the hidden expectations that were not spoken or even understood. We must get honest with ourselves about what our expectations were and then forgive ourselves and then we can forgive others.

This question and its answer hit really close to home for me. I’m experiencing a situation that has been very hard for me to forgive. It has been a source of pain and anguish for me and it is something that I am truly working on. I know that I need to get to the bottom of my expectations and true honesty with myself so that I can forgive myself and then hopefully have some peace. 

Are there things that you can do that enable others to be co-dependent? When you take responsibility for other people’s feelings does it encourage co-dependency?

When we enable someone, we don’t allow them to have consequences for the decisions that they make. Every choice has an outcome and we all need to learn to take responsibility for our outcomes. Consequences are our teachers. We need to look at our motives for why we are doing what we are doing. You can have empathy for someone and help them, but if we are “helping” to change another person’s emotional response because we are uncomfortable with it or if we have guilt/shame or do something for someone that they can/should do for themselves, then we are enabling.

What is it when we feel responsibility for others emotions?

It is shame. Shame will be featured on many other podcasts, but it is a belief/theme inside ourselves, typically learned at a very young age. Jodi said that we need to ask ourselves really hard questions to understand where the belief started. She also mentioned that when people come from a childhood environment where there was a lot of responsibility and little to no validation that people grow up to be adults who feel a strong responsibility for others (and not always for themselves).

Shame is what is driving drama and co-dependency. Is shame an emotion?

Shame is experienced by emotion and thought and shows up in 2 contrasting ways. It’s underlying feeling/belief that there is something wrong with me/I’m just not enough/not worthy or shame is also experienced as I’m better than you/I don’t have to follow the rules  

Jodi ends the podcast with a question to ask ourselves…..Do you have either of the contrasting feelings of shame?

 

Wow. So did you make it through-I know that there is a lot of words here! I didn’t cover everything that Jodi talked about so I hope you will go to the podcast (link above and you can also subscribe to the podcast channel in iTunes) and really listen to it. I’ve listened to it several times and will continue to do that with each podcast because I learn more from them every time I listen. When I first saw the title of this episode I almost skipped it and went to the next one, but I decided to listen to it and I’m glad I did because I feel like there are concepts/principles that apply to many situations. I hope you will listen to them all with me!


But of course there is more to it than just listening. We have to apply what we have learned and one of the ways that I would like to help you and me with that is to offer some journal cards each month that we can write down our thoughts and feelings and I think that will help us to really be aware of ourselves and where we need help.  So these C0-DEPENDENCY & CONNECT JOURNAL CARDZ are available for purchase. You can use them by themselves, in an art journal (or any other journal you have), in a scrapbook…..wherever you would like to help you connect with yourself and start your healing process. They are printable, so feel free to make extra copies if you need more (personal-use only)!

I have also created a fun art printable to remind you to CONNECT WITH YOU! Be aware of what you are feeling and why you are feeling it! Print it and hang it where you can see it every day! Also check out the other products you can purchase with my digital hand-lettering graphic!


And now if you feel like it, I’d love to hear from you! Feel free to email me at dedesmith32@gmail.com or comment below and I’d love to discuss this topic and connect with you! I hope you will join me in this journey of healing!

Our next podcast will be in January
(usually this will be every month, but with the holidays, we will skip December.)

January’s Podcast:
Connexions Classroom 
Episode 2: The Voice (Shame) is NOT Guilt!
 



Connect with me as we listen to podcasts
and journal our journey to healing.

Every 1st Sunday of the month

Filed Under: Blog Series, Personal, Podcast TherapyZ, Product Releases Tagged With: co-dependency, connect, connecting, connection, journal, journey, personal, podcast, relationships, therapy, weight loss

Family History TuesdayZ | Happy Place

Journal Prompt - Happy Place

Journal Prompt: Where are you the happiest? Describe that place.Journal Prompt - Happy Place

My Journaling:
I’ve never been happier than when I was with my family at Disneyland in December. Whenever I think of that special time I just feel so good inside and so happy that everything went so perfectly. It will be time that is treasured forever for my kids, my hubby and I. So that is my HAPPY PLACE – Disneyland and whenever I stop and think about that magical place, I still get those wonderful happy feelings. I’m so glad for good memories and things we can treasure inside our hearts and return to when we need our happy place.

Journal CardZ for this Week – MY HAPPY PLACE

DOWNLOAD LINK
Journal CardZ - My Happy Place by DesignZ by DeDe



Family History TuesdayZEach Tuesday, I am going to be offering prompts or ideas. If you don’t write in your journal regularly – I am going to encourage you to write just ONCE A WEEK and answer the question/idea that I give on Tuesdays. These ideas hopefully will spark a memory and you will be able to capture that in what you write/record so that it can be left for your children/grandchildren/family/friends. Give as much detail as you can when answering.

Will you do this for me? Will you do this for your families? You can write it down in a journal, you can type it up on a computer or journaling software, you can take a recorder and talk, you can videotape your answers, you can even scrap a page with the journaling. It doesn’t matter how you do this – it’s just important that you do it. The memories, the dates, the information is the only real thing we can leave to our families when we are gone.

New for 2015! Journal CardZ. A very popular trend right now is Pocket Scrapbooking. Part of pocket scrapbooking is journaling cards. So to help you scrap my weekly Journal Prompts, I am offering up 4×6 and 3×4 cards for your use every week! These cards are great to use digitally or you can even print them out!

Filed Under: Family Tree TuesdayZ, Freebies, Journal CardZ, Personal Tagged With: happy, happy place, journal, printable, prompt

Family History TuesdayZ | Looking Forward

Journal Prompt: Looking Forward

Journal Prompt: What are you looking forward to the most?
Journal Prompt: Looking Forward

My Journaling:
I really feel like having something to look forward to is important in life – at least it is for me. Being able to plan and dream a bit and just have something to keep me going is really important.
Right now the thing I am looking forward to the most is actually not set in stone – but we are hoping to visit Disneyland in December again and this time we are hoping to take my brother and his family with us. I really really hope it happens! I love spending time with Cody, Becki and Mallory. They are truly more than just siblings/niece to me – they are some of my best friends and I want to share the magic that is Disneyland with them! I hope it happens!

Journal CardZ for this Week – Looking Forward

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Journal CardZ - Looking Forward by DesignZ by DeDe



Family History TuesdayZEach Tuesday, I am going to be offering prompts or ideas. If you don’t write in your journal regularly – I am going to encourage you to write just ONCE A WEEK and answer the question/idea that I give on Tuesdays. These ideas hopefully will spark a memory and you will be able to capture that in what you write/record so that it can be left for your children/grandchildren/family/friends. Give as much detail as you can when answering.

Will you do this for me? Will you do this for your families? You can write it down in a journal, you can type it up on a computer or journaling software, you can take a recorder and talk, you can videotape your answers, you can even scrap a page with the journaling. It doesn’t matter how you do this – it’s just important that you do it. The memories, the dates, the information is the only real thing we can leave to our families when we are gone.

New for 2015! Journal CardZ. A very popular trend right now is Pocket Scrapbooking. Part of pocket scrapbooking is journaling cards. So to help you scrap my weekly Journal Prompts, I am offering up 4×6 and 3×4 cards for your use every week! These cards are great to use digitally or you can even print them out!

Filed Under: Family Tree TuesdayZ, Freebies, Journal CardZ, Personal Tagged With: forward, future, journal, look forward, prompt

Family History TuesdayZ | Perfect Day

Journal Prompt: Describe the Perfect Day

Journal Prompt: Describe the PERFECT Day. Put in as many details as you can. Make it a possible day, not a “dream day.”
Journal Prompt: Describe the Perfect Day

Journal CardZ for this Week – The Perfect Day

DOWNLOAD LINK
Journal CardZ - The Perfect Day by DesignZ by DeDe



Family History TuesdayZEach Tuesday, I am going to be offering prompts or ideas. If you don’t write in your journal regularly – I am going to encourage you to write just ONCE A WEEK and answer the question/idea that I give on Tuesdays. These ideas hopefully will spark a memory and you will be able to capture that in what you write/record so that it can be left for your children/grandchildren/family/friends. Give as much detail as you can when answering.

Will you do this for me? Will you do this for your families? You can write it down in a journal, you can type it up on a computer or journaling software, you can take a recorder and talk, you can videotape your answers, you can even scrap a page with the journaling. It doesn’t matter how you do this – it’s just important that you do it. The memories, the dates, the information is the only real thing we can leave to our families when we are gone.

New for 2015! Journal CardZ. A very popular trend right now is Pocket Scrapbooking. Part of pocket scrapbooking is journaling cards. So to help you scrap my weekly Journal Prompts, I am offering up 4×6 and 3×4 cards for your use every week! These cards are great to use digitally or you can even print them out!

Filed Under: Family Tree TuesdayZ, Freebies, Journal CardZ, Personal Tagged With: journal, new day, perfect, perfect day, prompt

Family History TuesdayZ | Call it a Family…

Journal Prompt: Call it a Family

Journal Prompt: Write whatever comes to mind when you read this quote: “Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.”
Journal Prompt: Call it a Family

My Journaling:
I find this quote to definitely be true. Family is so important – actually the most important thing in the world to me.  My husband and kids are my life and they are what make my life complete. Without my family, it would really be hard to even live any kind of life. I also think that FAMILY doesn’t have to be blood relatives.  I think the people that you most care about and the people who make life complete for you are family too. Also when I think of this quote, I think of the quote that “it takes a village….”.  I know that the people who help raise my kiddos are so important too. I think of my childhood and besides my own parents, siblings, grandparents, etc, there were so many people in the small town that I grew up in that taught me and inspired me and are the reason I am who I am…they are family to me too.
I’ve struggled with some relationship issues with my parents and as much as I love and appreciate them – there are just some things that we have been dealing with. And when there are family issues, life is definitely hard. It’s hard to not have a good relationship with family….family is needed and I’m so glad that I have my own husband and kids and other family members to get me through this rough time.

Journal CardZ for this Week – Call it a Family

DOWNLOAD LINK
Journal CardZ - Call it a Family by DesignZ by DeDe



Family History TuesdayZEach Tuesday, I am going to be offering prompts or ideas. If you don’t write in your journal regularly – I am going to encourage you to write just ONCE A WEEK and answer the question/idea that I give on Tuesdays. These ideas hopefully will spark a memory and you will be able to capture that in what you write/record so that it can be left for your children/grandchildren/family/friends. Give as much detail as you can when answering.

Will you do this for me? Will you do this for your families? You can write it down in a journal, you can type it up on a computer or journaling software, you can take a recorder and talk, you can videotape your answers, you can even scrap a page with the journaling. It doesn’t matter how you do this – it’s just important that you do it. The memories, the dates, the information is the only real thing we can leave to our families when we are gone.

New for 2015! Journal CardZ. A very popular trend right now is Pocket Scrapbooking. Part of pocket scrapbooking is journaling cards. So to help you scrap my weekly Journal Prompts, I am offering up 4×6 and 3×4 cards for your use every week! These cards are great to use digitally or you can even print them out!

Filed Under: Family Tree TuesdayZ, Freebies, Journal CardZ, Personal Tagged With: clan, family, journal, network, prompt, tribe, village

Family History TuesdayZ | Springtime Fun

Journal Prompt: What are your favorite things to do in the Spring?

Journal Prompt: What are your favorite things to do in the Spring?
Journal Prompt: What are your favorite things to do in the Spring?

My Journaling:
Spring isn’t my favorite. I’m more of a Fall/Winter person, but I do like seeing and smelling the new blossoms as they appear, so one of my favorite things to do is go for a walk when its still cool and just take in the beauty!

Journal CardZ for this Week – Springtime Fun

DOWNLOAD LINK
Journal Card - Springtime Fun by DesignZ by DeDe



Family History TuesdayZEach Tuesday, I am going to be offering prompts or ideas. If you don’t write in your journal regularly – I am going to encourage you to write just ONCE A WEEK and answer the question/idea that I give on Tuesdays. These ideas hopefully will spark a memory and you will be able to capture that in what you write/record so that it can be left for your children/grandchildren/family/friends. Give as much detail as you can when answering.

Will you do this for me? Will you do this for your families? You can write it down in a journal, you can type it up on a computer or journaling software, you can take a recorder and talk, you can videotape your answers, you can even scrap a page with the journaling. It doesn’t matter how you do this – it’s just important that you do it. The memories, the dates, the information is the only real thing we can leave to our families when we are gone.

New for 2015! Journal CardZ. A very popular trend right now is Pocket Scrapbooking. Part of pocket scrapbooking is journaling cards. So to help you scrap my weekly Journal Prompts, I am offering up 4×6 and 3×4 cards for your use every week! These cards are great to use digitally or you can even print them out!

Filed Under: Family Tree TuesdayZ, Freebies, Journal CardZ, Personal Tagged With: fun, journal, prompt, spring, spring fun

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I'm a wife, a mom, a blogger, a lover of crafting, and a graphic designer. I believe in living life to the fullest, sharing your heart and talents to enrich the lives of others, and then telling your story to leave as a legacy for those that come after you.



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Recipe ThursdayZ | Chickey Pasta

This week’s recipe  |  CHICKEY PASTA A delicious pasta dish that is light and yummy! The chicken pieces are heaven – in fact, you could just make the chicken and use as homemade chicken nuggets! Chickey Pasta Save Recipe Print Recipe My Recipes My Lists My Calendar Ingredients2 lb boneless skinless chicken breast, cut into[Read More…]

DeDe Smith

I am DeDe Smith of DesignZ by DeDe and I’m the proud creator of the TearZ, ScatterZ, and many more collections! I am a Digital Scrapbook Designer. I specialize on creating digital kits that help customers scrapbook the special moments in their lives. I hope that you can use my products to share your story[Read More…]

Jolly Holiday Surprise Adventure | First Magic Moments LO

I am so thankful that I started writing some of my memories down about this trip on the blog, because I think there is a lot I could have missed! I’m so thankful to not forget these stories! I didn’t write everything down, so from now on this album might not be as detailed, but[Read More…]

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